She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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