I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
