You smell like stripper and shame
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
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Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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