Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(720): View more from Colorado

i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc

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(407): View more from Florida

just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.

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(310): View more from California

My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.

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(314): View more from Missouri

I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha

(1-314): View more from Missouri

No.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo

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(423): View more from Tennessee

Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.

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