I wanna bring you to show and tell
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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