Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
