He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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