Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
