Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
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