This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
