I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
