Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to