My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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