Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize
