Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
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