you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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