Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Randomize
