I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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