How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
