There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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