You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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