Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize