The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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