She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Randomize
