if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
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he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
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Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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