Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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