Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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