Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?