I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
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Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop