Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
