We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize
