I want to stick my p in your. b.
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
