There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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