Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
