Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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