dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
