I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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