Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Randomize
