Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
