Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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