yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
