you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
