You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
this beer tastes like vomit already
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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