one might say we're banned from that church
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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