these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
did i walk over a car last night?
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
