No awkward lesbian experiences without me
4 words: hood of his car
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
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