I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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