i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
