Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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