you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
