these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
