you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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